12. Some Homestuck Bullshit

         Homestuck fan fiction? Who asked for it? Why is it here? Who cares? Let’s read.

It’s in second person and at first sounds like a weird love letter, but it turns out we’re following the main character through a second person point of view, or am I the main character? This confuses me.

“You smiled as you kept walking, you were visiting your adorable Mastersprite: Karkat Vantas. Some would have thought he was a complete crabass, but you knew different.” What did I just read? Does this make sense to any normal people?

As I read it, I only pick up the gist but I know nothing about these characters, I’ve been lucky enough to avoid Homestuck like a plague, so all of these names are coming off as gibberish.

“…you turned to see Eridan siting on a wall dusting some snow and ice from his cape, then he put it back up. Well, you should have expected to see either a seadweller of Gamzee.” A, A seadweller? Gamee? Eridan, like the main enemy from Witcher 3? I think I want to play some Gwent right now.

I think a character has a speech impediment, because Eridan’s speech has extra w’s and v’s that don’t make any sense.

From what I’ve collected about this story (a total sum of jack-fucking-shit), it’s probably clichéd. It sure ends that way, “he’d do anything for you,” makes me want to vomit.

You walk in on your lover cheating, and you get sad, so this douche comes along and comforts you.

I honestly have an aneurysm from trying to wrap my head around this; this story was equivalent to reading something in a language oh so similar to yours, but different enough to confuse you.

It wasn’t funny bad, it wasn’t horrible bad, it was just bad

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